LOL. It’s just a joke about “world famous traveler”, but it’s true about my job. I left my official job on a military plant. Thankfully. We on the crossroads with my life’s plans and this work. The boss did not say anything, but the answer on his face was read for a long time familiar to me. Such as can be seen on the faces of people who seemed to be friends all their lives, but realized that they would not see each other again. Two weeks left. It happened exactly after my return from tourist rally that took place in Guslitsa (biggest European art space).
September for me, for some reasons, becomes a month of changes. Two years ago, I quit my previous job at the same time to pursue my dream to be a free man with a camera, but I didn't have enough strength and experience, so I failed. If you Imagine your life as a climbing on the top of the hill military plant was for me kind of a plateau where I can rest. And I did, for almost 2 years. It’s time to go back on the trail up to the hill.
However, nothing happens suddenly. Suddenly the wizard in the helicopter will not arrive. Suddenly in the morning you will not left your career for the sake of an idiotic dream. These thoughts come long before. In the future, I will tell you that after visited tourist rally I quit my job and began to travel. It will be a compact romantic truth to entice you. My mind will soon forget that before this there was a whole sequence of forward movements (not always pleasant and often doubtful). The rest will be history. This is in human nature, perhaps I try to describe these strange movements to not forget.
4 September. Moscow. I come to the central entrance of the Kazansky railway station, where I and the other participants were to be picked up by a bus to take to the tourist rally. In 2020 event was held in an incredibly atmospheric place called the Guslitsa Art Space. For 8 years of volunteering and enthusiasm, the factory of the 18th century was turned into a real forge of creative personnel. In addition to the fact that every corner breathes history, wherever you look, you will see art everywhere.
As soon as we arrived, I continued to hurry somewhere. This is the trait of a citizen who always needs to do something every minute. I walked around the estate, I could not find a place for myself, but exactly until I saw the samovar. A prominent uncle poured me tea from a samovar. A sip, a second, another sip... Relaxation. That’s it. I'm on the hook of that space.
I am too lazy to describe each further step. It was a meeting with old friends, a desire to make new ones, a desire to find answers to difficult questions, and so on. Last year I went to the rally absolutely sure that only people with a egoistic self lovers gather there. But instead, I got a vector, flew to North Ossetia and made sure that the chosen direction was correct. At this event I was interested in specific people, specific answers to questions.
Maybe because of a specific goals I missed most of the speakers' speeches, I don't know. In the end, I got what I wanted. Only in an informal meeting near the open fire you drink beer or tea with the director of a TV channel, a famous blogger you don’t know before, or just a young redneck who left home at the age of 16 without telling to his parents.
Everyone at the event may have different fates, paths, desires, but only here the roads must cross where we can share stories of which there cannot be in reality, tells about fears, pain and plans ... If you take a simple glass and start pouring water into it, then the water must first reach the edge of the glass. Then surface tension should form, after which the water splashes out and a new path can be seen around the bend. It was my feelings after event.
When you spend three days in a place full of nirvana, sleep in a hammock and eat the simplest food, you understand that there is an alternative in this life. You don't want to return to reality. You don’t want to go back to the submarine in a cramped cabin, close the hatches and stare at the monitor all day long with a dream of a blue sky. How can you stay at work in a place like this? After the tourist rally, where the atmosphere is absolutely opposite. To return to where the “king” is a tyrant, where effective managers look at you from the perspective of a resource, where no one wishes a “good morning” to each other? It was my final tension point. Time has come. It's time to leave this damn submarine, this island of safety! My blood boils again for a beautiful unknown tomorrow!
Leaving is always scary. This is normal. But at this time I'm more prepared. If necessary, I will do it over and over again. This time I became more confident in myself. You need to value yourself as a specialist, love yourself as a person if you want to help others. Help those who want it. I’m on the one step closer to my dream…